This is the story of Eric Anoint,
Who firmly believed that the world had no point,
He cared not for Christmas or Sugarplum treats,
Bosoms or ankles or pretty pink feet.
His teachers all dreaded him, he was banned from their class,
He never even commented on his girlfriend’s neat ass,
He never gave presents and left his untouched,
His clothes were unironed, his curtains unrucked.
He once went to Paris but was bored by the tower,
And said no to the prossies who charged by the hour,
So he went to New Jersey, said, This all there is?
Then stopped by a restroom to go for a whiz,
Where he peed on a live wire that killed him stone dead,
And his last words were why did I get out of bed?