Let us go then, you and I,
To where the remnant copies are stacked up tall and high,
Let us discuss those certain much-neglected tomes,
By lonely authors who pick the bones.
And on the site the fangirls come and go,
Gossiping that Robert Pattinson will play Michelangelo.
Oh, I grow weary, I grow weary,
I eye my number one position leery,
Shall I fall a vote behind?
Do I dare to give five stars?
I hear the lower-rankers whispering in bars.
And as if my lonely life is thrown upon the screen,
A jerky Quick Time rendering of my lost and broken dream,
And as I lift the latest book of literary cordon bleu,
The readers call out, Harriet, please give us your view,
And so my tired fingers stroke the keyboard in my darkened room,
I pen another Amazon review to keep me number one.