I was sitting here one evening when my doorbell it did toll,
It was a man from city hall who brought the voters’ roll,
He said, you’re Mr Scratchmann, I have you on my list,
Of those who we allow to vote who are not stoned or pissed.
I said to him, why thank you, it’s a thrill indeed to vote,
But isn’t the election over, I think you’ve missed the boat,
He said, there’ll be another, it is a regular game,
But honestly, mate, why bother, they’re all the bloody same.
The candidates are crooked, the parties they are bland,
They’ll tax the pants right off you and leave nothing in your hand,
They’ll foreclose on your mortgage and freeze your credit card,
And build highways through your living room and contaminate your yard.
Then they’ll double global warming till it’s like a kitchen hob,
But please do go on voting, it keeps me in a job!