The House Mouse

There once was a mouse, who lived in a house, and a jolly old mouse was he,
He loved a cat, a mangy old rat, who sailed on the silvery sea,
“Oh pussy-cat, pussy-cat, sail home to me,” the love-sick old mouse did reply,
“Oh no, oh no,” the cat replied, “I’m allergic to land that is dry!”

So the mouse, from the house, went to the ice cream man, said: “My lover lives out at sea”
And the Lollipop Man, in the Ice Cream Van, said: “Why the fuck are you telling me?”
So the mouse form the house consulted a louse, about the cat who sailed out on the sea,
And the louse told the mouse to go back to his house, which wasn’t really earning his fee.

So the mouse tried to douse his pussy-cat Scouse from his achy-breaky heart,
And the cat, who was sat on a mariner’s mat, said: “It’s over, it’s time to part!”
So the mouse killed the louse, buried him under the house, with a racquet that was made by Slazenger,
Said: “If I can’t have my cat on my fireside mat, I’ll bloody well shoot the messenger!”

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Filed under comic verse, funny poem, humorous verse, Nonsense verse, whimsy

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